+ I will keep my eyes upon Jesus +

Tuesday, August 30, 2005

almost a week le....

woah.. time really flies... im really very busy these days.... i cant remember everything i felt for the past week... here goes....

wed went for bible study at alvin's.... after that went to play basketball with wee kiat... i seriously hate playing at the court near alvin's house... the ball always lands on my head... last time i went there one ball hit straight on top mf my skull.... this time, the ball hit my head TRICE... darn... it hurts so so much.... aawww....

thursday went to omni theater... the science center one.... watched mystic indea... see until tou yun... gong gong... after that went prayer walking in woodlands... to prepare the way for this sat... evangelism....

friday to sunday is dead tiring.... here's why.....

friday went school.... and had mock exams... our mock exams started.... do like mad... den found out the dun need hand in one.... what the?!?! hahaz... after that did detention... den went home...
went over to hougang... to meet alex... went over to his house to play keyboard... guitar( i brought mine)... his xbox.... watched ro.... and he cooked... steak... that was way awesome... very juicy... we ate and watched kung fu hustle... nothing to do den watch loh.... i slept over at his house... but cant sleep at all... not used to it ba... i slept on the darn cold hard floor!!! /sob... din sleep well... next day went home... before i left i almost wanted to go into celine's room and take a peek... but i din... later i found out that she was sleeping half naked.. = /... lucky i din go in sia... later she scream... =/

rushed home... reached at 10.... have to go out at around 11.30... rushed to church, went woodlands... street evangelism!!! i saved one!!! den go back church.... den after that went yishun safta.... AGAIN... sigh... reached home rather late.... and snored loudly....

got up at 6.15.... told zhi and vinda to morning call me at 6... and zhi to snooze morning call me at 6.15... hahaz... went church... cafe duty!!! im the washer!!! washed the whole morning... till i blister.... /sob... after that went dotaing at lanlab.... den go qin ching's house have bbq... to celebrate sab's birthday, as well as to launch zealot 2!!! new cell with zhi zhi as the leader... jia you wor.... pray that cell cont to grow!!!

monday nothing lahz... mock exams loh....

btw, peiyi came back to the lord... YAY!!! prayer answered... now still got how many...? hmmm...

today's colour: give me oil in my lamp, keep me burning.....

I blogged @ | 7:25 AM

{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

it is over.. my Dnt...

finally DnT dun need to do le... i cannot take it anymore anyway.... hahz...

saturday i went cell in qc house... it was great... edifying... nothing much....

after that went to church to have a combined cell group.... all xiang shu's side one... talked about street evangelism.... woah... exciting....

after that went nite life... xiang shu shared about God's presence... it is seriously important... and it also dragged for some time... i went to pray for teck soon, liang zhi, wee kiat, shun qi.... God also told me something... make sure you're right with me before praying for others.... woah... ok... i spent some time on my knees praying... den i went ahead and pray for them....

after that had a short dinner... and a short meeting with my da lau po.... finally... after so long... i see it again... but den went to shop and save to buy cafe things with liping and yue ying... argh... den have to go up go down buy stuff... den i got everything... went back church....

liping: "ok ni ke yi zhou le."
ying ying: "bei li yong wan le... hahaz"

hahz... true...i kena used... but i let myself be used anyway....

after that took a cab down to yishun safta country club.... drink beer... sing song... dance... play pool... woohoo... cool.... had so much fun...

next morning got a hangover... argh....

went tuition.... as normal... den went home... played ro... and found out that clan risa lost it's castle....

darn it... i felt so guilty.... not being able to commit to clan risa... to train well and make them proud... after receiving a phen card, slotted circlet, arc wand, +9 4 slotted mace (this thing is so darn ex) 300 pots... and loads of support from them.. felt dso guilty... as if i owe them... i just wanna return in kindness.... to level the guild up.... to fight for them... to take over and defend our castles... one day i'll help get back clan risa....

went grandma house... as usual... nothing much....

monday went school... expected the teacher to go through papers.... but we cant get them back till wed... oh well... went home and pia RO.... 3 job levels!! woohoo!!! 4 more job and i'll be wiz....

tue went school.... as usual... after school zhizhi came my house... RO... he created a char... and trained till lvl 33 in 4 hours!!! siao right?!?! hhaz... cos i gave him 350 pots and the +9 4 slotted mace... muahahz... den went long john... combo 1... got 3 pic of chicken... hahz....

thanks guys... you all are always there when i need you.... look at my tagboard... darn flooded... love you all... you guys brightened up my life....

today's colour: thank you people!!!

I blogged @ | 2:22 PM

{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}

Saturday, August 20, 2005

it's over....

it's finally over... my perlims... and perhaps my childishness....?

wednesday had science papers... simple, actually.... i sleep more than i did my questions... i always do this well, even without studying... im not bragging... just telling facts...

after that went to macdonalds behind our school to study with sabrina, mark, shara and danelle... sang a happy birthday song for danelle... it's her birthday... we bought just a lil cake.. nothing much... but it's still cool.... i did some DnT... sabrina did math as it's math paper 2 the next day.... asked me some questions... i stared at the question for 10 min... than realise that it could be solved rather easily.... what came over me....? exam stress...? i never felt any in my entire life... or issit the reason that teck soon wanna see me later on...? im freaking myself out....

after that went to westmall bk... i din eat anything.... but crap... my heart was beathing fast.... God's preparing my heart.... i felt it again... God's prompting... his conviction in my heart.... well... im not telling what happened during the conversation... the more i talk about it the more i feel sad....

but seriously folks.... am i that scary...? why am i scaring ppl away...? how come there are still people who are avoiding me like plaque...? am i that irritating....? does my childishness disgust you..? i'm not sure... but perhaps it's time... or it should have been a long time ago... i think i should grow up.... throw away my childishness.... and just be mature and sensative to others.... get out ot the immature, naive, disgusting and irritating me... just throw away my own lil world and start to live in this big world full of other people.... maybe it's time... but even if im woken up from my sleep.... how long will i stay awake...? how long will i stay mature...? will i ever go back to the childish and naive me....? i will never know the future....

thursday had math paper 2... did for 50 min... slept for 40... ah well... that's what i always do... after school went to bind my Dnt... waited for so darn long... after binded went to touch up a bit and handed in.... but it's still not the end...

friday had Dnt... my last paper... finally.... last paper... i anyhow did it... i dun care about Dnt... not anymore... this stupid subject have took many sleepless nights.... i dun wanna care... i dun like this subject at all... darn stressful....

after school i even had to stay back to do the final touching up for my DnT.... ouch... and i was done only at around 3.30... crap!! i wanted to spend time with my mum... wanna have lunch with her... and just hang out with her... i never really got the chance to go out with my mum.... and i cherish every time i have with her.... crap man... stupid dnt take up so much time... i dun have time for so many things... sleep.... time with family... i sacrificed it all for my work... hate this man.... i wanna spend time with my family... how i love them so... and yet unable to commit to them... haiz....

i rushed to causeway point.... had some pasta and pizza... was so full.... thank you mum.... but i have to rush to westmall after that... haiz... im always so rushy... how i wish i could take some time and just relax... close my eyes.... really sleep well... without interuption... i cant really do that nowadays... weekdays have school... sat have church... sun have tuition... life is so tiring....

after that went bk... but zhi told us go bukit timah mac... so we went there... and crap my dad cought me with shara.... ah well... i'll laugh it off...

zealot is splitting.... the original zealot and the zealot with all new members... zhizhi will be taking shara and sabrina along... me...? im goin over to alvin's side... so i'll be under new management... haiz... have to adapt... i'll miss you guys... shara, sabrina, liang zhi.... it was great to be in the same core with you guys... love you all forever...

crap... this whole thing is crap... im feeling crap.... too tired... just wanna sleep... but cant even find the time... have to sacrifice my own time for other stuff.... i cant take it already... im fully stretched... and now... knowing that i just stumbled a fellow sister... isint making anything better... i felt guilty... felt like crap... aw crap....

i still love my own little world....

today's colour: can i stay in my own little world for good and dun give a crae about anything in the world...?

I blogged @ | 4:01 PM

{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

founder's men!!

this is for jesslyn aka justin!! hahaz... she wanted it... and here it is....

friday got eng paper 1 and 2... it's not that bad... but i suddenly forgot the format for formal letter!! aahh!! dunno how... think im gonna die!!! den at night i stayed up whole night to do my DnT... argh... so tired....

saturday went out!! never go cell cos cancelled... den rong jun, lester, jesslyn, michelle lo, danelle, zhi zhi, sab sab and lele went singapore poly.... go see alvin, wee kiat, andy, shun rong and many others get their "lau ah peh".... founders!!! while we were there we met lunatics... one said hi to us.... and we totally dunno him!!! hahaz... freaky... jesslyn told snort jokes.... alot of lame jokes... den laugh laugh laugh... hahaz... maybe for once jireh and zealot can go out for outing and we can have fun together!!! hahaz....

after that we went nite life... in the bus something stupid happened... this girl was getting off her seat... her feet stuck out... at the same time i was walking foward... den i dunno what happened... i kicked her slipper and it flew to the middle of the bus!! oh mi gosh!!! was so pai seh... hahaz... jesslyn was surpressing her laugh.... shara dun surpress at all... but also din laugh that loud... argh... so pai seh....

den nite life got someone else come and share... this ang mo.... and that guy make me pai seh about my chinese... he speak better than me!! argh!!! better brush up on chinese liaoz....

monday have math paper 1 and social studies... first time ever write so much nia... 4 pages FULL.... hahaz... went zhi's house bible study... den halfway only... cos he got tuition.... aww.... so sad... BURN DOWN HIS BLOG!!! hahaz...

tuesday had 1 gro paper... den i realise... i dun have pencil!!! ahh!!! den i dunno how... die le lahz... after that went zhizhi house with alvin... initial intention... study... actual.... sleep!!! muahahz!! went his house to fix maple... but his graphic card 6 years old le... need a new one... so cannot... den sab, ling and andy came... after awhile ling and andy left... alvin also left... den hannah and shufen came zhizhi's house... bible study... den after that they play with gin gin.. and gingin bit me!!! now my hand got 2 holes... cos of that stupid cat!!! boo!!!

been fun these days... though tiring myself out to finish my DnT... i still enjoyed the week... yay....

today's colour: my fave colour!! so happy today...

I blogged @ | 11:53 AM

{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}

Friday, August 12, 2005

weiwei wanted this....

this is for weiwei!! hahaz....

tuesday went with my family to jurong.... to watch fireworks.... guess who i saw...? alot of ppl!!! first qiu yuan... den joey, joel, janice, faith, si heng also came along!! den say jasmine( xiao bai tu) and the xiao long nu.... dunno her name... also saw chin, bear, sweaty goat, zhi qing, vivian, lisa, andy and nana... zhi zhi also saw me... but din see him... so sad... fireworks were cool.... you should have seem how thde crowd moved when the fireworks went off... hahaz...

wednesday stay at home do dnt... that's all... nothing much... boring day!!!

thursday went school... chinese prelims... woah... die liaoz.... i see paper 1.... the compo part very hard to write!!! see liaoz wanna cry... but in the end write rubbish... hahaz...

eh.. really duno what to post lehz... post rubbish lohs... smiles everyone....

today's colour: you add your colour yourself... i seriously dunno today's colour....

I blogged @ | 11:41 AM

{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}

Tuesday, August 09, 2005

woah... i was so busy....

along with close friends, God also blessed me with one thing... a good family... i love my family... read on and find out why....

i got my phone back on wednesday.... cos my grandma goes to the hospital often... and i have to be informed.... guys... please pray for my grandma.... currently having a tumour in her lung... have no idea if it's harmful.... keep her in prayer please....

thursday was the last day of school for the week.... i got friday off.... and i was late for school... meaning... detention.... i was supposed to send my grandma to hospital.... but due to detention i cant... my mum understood... and told me to go, and asked my dad to drive her there... wow... i felt guilty, and she din scold me....? this may be nothing to you guys... but it touched me.... oh well....

friday went out with alex.... this poor guy... i seems to be his only friend... i try to spend as much time with him as possible.... so i volunteered to go out with him on friday... cant stay for too long... cos i have Festival of Praise to go to... we sat down with a cup of drink and talked.... talked for 2 hours and we din know that.... time really flies when you are enjoying... i think im beginning to enjoy this beautiful friendship....

went to the festival of praise.... sat with weiwei, jaslyn and some guys from jireh... i was split up with my cell cos i was in front, showing the jireh guys alex's ro art book.... and i lost them.... aw.... in the end my cell mates din manage to get in.... only me and teck soon from zealot got in.... i feel so guilty.... but they din mind.... i felt even worse... haiz...

after that went home... sent jireh's sister home, and i dunno her name yet....( jireh as in the guy named jireh, not the cell group named jireh, please take note...) i reached home around 0030.... my dad was using the com... surprisingly he din scold me.... even asked..." hey son, how's your night...?'' again this might be nothing, but it touched me nevertheless.... this shows that he cares about me feelings....

saturday i slept in.... after that went cell group... and snl.... after snl jesslyn, anathan, zhizhi, alvin, ken quak, yong quan, derek and youngly went Dota.... and i no money... or else i'll be GODLIKE!!! muahahaz... but there's nobody like him, that's for sure....

sunday woke up early for tuition... after that went NUH fetch my grandma home... after that went lunch... den me, mummy and my sis went ntuc... guess what....? i saw shammah!! funny sia... den call my mother choose honeydew... hahaz... but den got ppl dao me wor... hmmm.... no hope le lahz....

after that i went home and pia my DnT.... at 3 a.m. in the morning i found out that i lost everything from defination to chosen ideas... oh no!!!! and at 5 a.m. my com crashed... have to reformat everything... and i mean everything... meaning restore factory settings... my wrok from 0100 to 0500 all went down the drain....

fear came over me... i told my mum about it... and she was equally shocked.... i can see that she's more worried than me.... she turned on the com, hoping for a miracle, that the file would be there, but it's too late... all have been wiped.... she searched my room, hoping for a miracle, that my lost work would be found... but still she cant find.... im touched by such gesture... i lost my work... but she's more worried than me.... i dunno what to say.... except... thanks mum... i love you....

i dragged my body down to school... having the sad look... mdm yaw asked why.... i told her and she offered me a verse... romans 8:28.... and we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose... woah.... God's messenger....

i can feel the care and concern.... thank you dear Lord Jesus... for providing for me.. friends, family.... people who care.... now i know i am no longer lonely....

today's colour: i can feel the warm love...

I blogged @ | 10:20 AM

{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

relac one corner...

if everyday can relax one corner and slack all day.... that'll be great... this would be my dream life... but as i said... DREAM....

monday i had my phone confiscated... boo... after school went to play basketball to let of my anger... played with sherman, jasper, ming xian... i LOVE playing with them... this is what basketball should be... free and easy... fun and not stressful... relaxed and filled with laughter... but too bad this can only be among great friends... you play with other ppl they take the game too seriously, and it all turns out stressful, with vulgarities flying here and there, telling ppl to block, get out of the box and such... but our joy were shortlived... ppl came in, wanted 2nd team... oh well... i went home.... if everyday i can play like this... it'll be great...

after that went home with jian sheng... also had a great time with him by just laughing... telling lame and stupid jokes... and laugh at anything and everything.... met regina and bao zuan at the mrt station... lamed with them... laughed my head off... hahaz... if everyday was so relaxing... that'll be great.... i love monday....

tuesday... let's not talk about morning... nor afternoon.... in fact, not a good day... stressful with work... almost cant take it anymore... but im holding on.. i have to....

tireness come over me... thankfully there are friends to take away part of my stress, and bring laughter into my life... i thank God for them....

today's colour: thank you, my dear friends... you know who you are....

I blogged @ | 2:16 PM

{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}

Monday, August 01, 2005

i had it....

im seriously tired....

friday had a great time with alex... after school, went to play a lil bit of basketball, and went to hougang... to meet alex... we went to grab a drink... talked crap.... den went to 7-11... cooked instant noodles and sat down and talked crap.... hahaz...

after that went to his house... he showed his work... what he have written... about friendship and what you should do... never knew he could write so well... but the touching thing is im the first to read it... i noticed that there's no folding at the edge of the paper where it was stapled... yup... im the first to read it... was kinda touched.... after that went to play xbox... wanted to wait till celine get's back... (btw celine is alex's elder sister) but mum called me around 8... meaning i have to go home!!! and celine only returned around 11... aaww... cant see her again... in fact i've never seen my ex GM before.... knew her for more than 1 year le... hmmm....

saturday went to sentosa with rowl and 53rd... play whole day!! morning played some activities... like mines and such... den got dunno what throwing game... but den it began to rain!!! aww!!! we hid inside a playground house... hhaz... me , joanne, wee kiat and youngly shared one house... and our house was big.... rowl have to stand in one small tiny hut... so poor thing...

at the house we played with water... childish right...? but we had fun... cos we're bored!! very bored!! den collected rainwater and pour here pour there... hahaz... really really bored.... den the rain stopped, we went out to play... there was this swing thing.... whereby 4 ppl ait, and were swung around in circles... everybody tried... everybody fell off it... hahaz... cos alvin, zhizhi, wei xiong, wk, teck soon and me push that thing around... and ppl start to fall... and walk in circles.... gong liaoz...

after that went to church... talking about fleeing from temptation... hmmm... seems to apply in my life.... im seriously tired of falling into temptation.... God... save me.... im too tired....

im lifting my life into his hands... i cant take my life anymore... it's too tiring... stress from school... have so much commitments... it's hard to juggle them all... i wanna just throw them aside and dun care... but i cant... God... please... help me....

today's colour: im feeling weak...

I blogged @ | 4:40 AM

{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}