Sunday, September 24, 2006 lost...
i've lost so much things over the past few days...lost the fire, the hungry...lost all energy, but still have to fight on...lost all dignity, prestige... my name being blasphemed...lost battles, falling into temptations...lost fights, giving in to weakness...lost some friends, being shunned away...lost some more friends, being told to shun them...lost all will...lost all hope...
I blogged @ | 10:00 PM
{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}
Saturday, September 23, 2006 i am weary...
i dun think you guys know, but i've been crying every single day... tears just flow even when i stare into space... ah well...my granduncle was dignosed with lung cancer a couple of months back... he refused treatment, and the cancer cells spread... his brain is now affected, which affects the right side of his body, causing disfunctioning... he fell down and broke his pelvis... was admitted to hospital...i was having coffee with him at the hospital, and suddenly he dropped his cup... at that split second he lost control of his arm... thank God he regained control before he spilled any coffee on his lap... hai...doctor said that he need treatment.. radioteraphy and i dunno what else... but the doctors are considering the actions, as he does not have long left...2 months, that's what they say... hai...happier things... i planned to go east coast on friday, cell group people went there to relax cos the prelims was over... i went home, told my grandma that i'll be out the whole day... she ask me if im accompanying her to the see the doctor in the evening, i said most probably not... she shot me one sentence.."your friends so important meh...? more important than me..?"i sian diao... called liangzhi and told him im sorry, cant make it for the outing.... went to my bedroom to cry... totally fed up... i wanna relax, i need a break, but im not given one... bounded by my family... hai...ok, even happier things... after that i wept and napped... after that i woke up, used the computer... complained about what happened to my aunt over msn, how i was "emotionally blackmailed"... after awhile there was a knock on the door... i opened, there stood a man in a biker's helmet.. was astonished, told him i never order anything, but he says the address is correct... i opened the door, took the large super supreme, bottle of pepsi and a loaf of garlic bread... signed the invoice, i asked him how much... he told me it's already paid... woah... God's blessing for a sad soul... God loves me man...later i found out that it was my aunt who bought me the pizza... haha... went to see the docs with my grandma, my aunt joined us later on and asked me about the pizza... lol, God worked through her to bless me... she also bought me speakers for my mp3 as well as headsets for the computer... meaning, i can bug people on msn with voice clips again... muahahaha...today went to church, cried out like never before... even when the pastor started talking, my tears are still flowing silently... haha... im a crybaby!!after that dinner, home, here i am typing... rawr... im hungry... bleahz..today's colour: will God cry with me..?
I blogged @ | 10:20 PM
{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}
Sunday, September 17, 2006 devistator quiz from waiwai..
1. Full name: Ken Lim June Kuang2. Name backwards: gnauK enuJ miL neK3. Meaning of the name: 林俊权 –〉(林)= just a surname (俊)=英俊(handsome) (权)= 权力 (with authority), ken also means the handsom one.. but am i really..?4. Nickname: kenken, kendyfloss, pig, winnie the pooh, brother bear, 熊猫, 狗熊 , more to come.5. Screen name: kendy6. D.O.B: 3rd july 19897. Place of birth: Singapore.8. Nationality: Singapore citizen.9. Current location: A HDB flat in Choa Chu Kang a.k.a home.10. Star sign: cancer, the giant crab!!11. Religion: Christian12. Height: About 1.77m.13. Weight: can i dun reveal..? but i lost 10kg in 1/2 a year.. =)14. Shoe size: 10 or 11.. i think 10.5.15. Hair colour: Black and a bit of white.16. Eye colour: brown17. Who do you think u look like: some say i look like winnie the pooh, thus getting my nickname... but i think im unique, nobody looks like me!!18. Innie or outtie: outtie..19. Lefty of righty: Lefty...20. Gay,straight,bi or others: others..? such as homo..? lol im straight..21. Best friends: eh... best..? dun really have such.. michael and liangzhi is very close though..22. Best friends u trust most: those mentioned on top...23. Favourite pals: Zealot, usher!!24. Best friend of opposite sex: all the same lahz..25. Best buddies: how you define buddies..?26. Boyfriend of galfriend: too young now.. =)27. Crush: shan't reveal!!28. Parents: Mum and Dad.29. Worst enemy: Satan30. Favourite online guy: ken quak, talk to him alot over msn, and michael, send me GBA roms..31. Favourite online gal: no favorites... =) all the same, talk with them alot loh..32. Craziest fren: zealot peeps!!33. Advice fren: Xiang Shu, liangzhi..34. Loudest friend: the one i see in the mirror..35. Person u cry with: God, Parents, zealot peeps..36. Any sisters: 137. Any brother: 1.38. Any pets: 3 hamsters, alot died... have fish... had a thousand plus 龙鱼, died when my dad fet it a 50 cents centipede which is supposed to be a treat for it... had terapins and contemplated a rabbit..39. Any disease: asthma, 闪光.40. Pager: it's been ages since i heard someone said:"who page"..? but i've seen docs carry them41. Personal phone line: shan't reveal...42. Phone: Handphone? --> Nokia 602043. Lava lamp: i want one!! someone buy me one..?44. Pool or hot tube: eh..?45. A car: i want one too!! someone buy me one..?46. Your personality: extrovant, loud, happy go lucky, farnie and alot more...47. Driving: soon, that's all i can say.. soon..48. Room: dark..49. What's missing: i want a bass!! but my current have it's D string missing... aww..50. School: bukit batok secondary..51. Bed: Seahorse brand I think. o.O52. Relationship wif parents: i love my mummy and daddy..53. Believe in urself: no earthly confidence.. only by His blood..54. Believe in love at first sight: puppy love at first sight..55. Good listener: i dunno... i think i am... =)56. Get along well wif parents: very well... dad gave me $50, told me go cheers get 12 cans of beer, drank and shared his burdens in his heart with me...57. Save email conversations: i do save some special and cute ones..58. Pray: duh... i read my bible and pray everyday!!59. Believe in reincarnation: do the same thing over and over again for eternailty..? PLEASE, NO!!60. Make fun of ppl: have i ever not made fun of people..?61. Like to talk on the phone: depends on who im talking to..62. Want to get married: im still young.. =)63. Like to drive: behind the wheels, wind in my hair, feet on the gas pedals.... i think i'll love it..64. Motion sickness: thank God no..65. Eat stem of broccoli: i dun choose... i chomp down the whole thing..66. Eat chicken wif fork: Hands. God gave us hands. hands to hold chicken and eat.67. Dream in colour: yeah... i dream in pictures...68. Type wif ur fingers on home role: what does that mean..?69. Sleep wif stuff animals: when my sister throws fluffy down at me while i was sleeping..70. Next to you: my chair..71. On the walls of your room: glow in the dark star thingy..72. On your mousepad: i dun have a mouse pad.. poor mouse of mine..73. Dream car: Mazda RX-7, same as waikiat..74. Dream date: my mummy!! lol, joke... no real dream dates..75. Dream honeymoon spot: Australia.. or somewhere near nature...76. Dream husband n wife: one who cooks well... =D77. Bedtime: when im sleepy..78. Under ur bed: extra mattress, bible.. i do my quiet time in bed, thus chuck it down there for convinience sake..79. Single most important question: why am i always hungry..?80. Bad time of the day: when i was sleepy or when i was crying...81. Your worst fear: girls crying... it gives me creeps to see a girl crying...82. The weather is: Cooling..83. Time: 1.10a.m., and im not in bed yet..84. Date: 17th september 200685. Best trick did on someone: forgot...86. Theme song: Granda mushashi, flame of recca, samurai X season 2...87. Hardest thing abt growing up: becoming more responsible, not only for yourself but for ones around you..88. Funniest experience: dun remember..89. Scariest experience: lonliness even among multitudes..90. Silliest thing u have ever said: so many i cant pick one up now.. 91. Most desperate and funniest thing u have ever done to an opposite sex: it's so embarassing i shall not reveal here...92. Scariest thing when you are with your friends: erm... dang, i really dunno... 93. Worst feeling: Being left out by friends...94. Best feeling in the world: know that you're being loved... =)And the lucky ones (muahahahaha):anyone who's interested... =)
I blogged @ | 12:47 AM
{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}
Sunday, September 10, 2006 holidays!!
bleahz... holidays still so freakin tired.. but i had fun... =)monday i turned down all requests to go out... im too beat to do anything, so i rested at home... it's a holy day!!tuesday i went for core group meeting and leaders meeting at church office... talked about managing our o levels.. ah well... after that went to play basketball... den went home...wednesday i went to study with qc... my head almost burst, i cant take it... i dunno how to do, den i asked elvin, who was also there at that moment.. only after that did i find out that the solution is actually so simple.. bleahz... cant take it, went home sleep...thursday is even more hectic... woke up at 12, straight away fried beehoon... that's for the barbecue later on at qc's house... after that grandma told me to go to my grandpa's house to clean up... argh, im tired of that... grandpa passed me 1.8k, saying that he picked 2k up from the ground... im shocked to see so much money in my hands, but still got it delivered to my grandma at home.. it's not for me, sadly.. haha..after that went to sheng siong to get food for the barbecue... sandy waited for us for quite a long time.. we got all the items, total is more than $80.. ouch.. it's gonna cost us man... after that went for the bbq... it was fun!!! the skies looked as if it was going to rain... we prayed, and there wasn't any rain for that night.. praise God..went home and sleep... reached home late, around 11++... ah well..friday is even worse... woke up at 11am, went to lot 1 at 11.30... met gerrold and michael, went for a movie, the host.. talked about genetic mutation of animals due to chemicals released into a river... was scary, but also sad... the monster died a very tragic death... it died with an arrow in it's eye, soaked with kerosene that was combusting on him, a spear down it's troat, biochemical weapons sprayed on it and with an empty stomach... the main character died, so sad... she's rather cute too... ah well...after that we went for an hour of pool... melvin joined us, and we were really having fun... gerrold, who wasn't really good at it, pocketed the last ball.. he's getting better!!after that we went grocery shopping... bought minced pork, 1.8kg worth... i am really a noob at shopping.. i could have asked the meat counter to pack me 1.8kg worth of minced pork... instead, i got 8 readily packed airpork... how dumb... went home after that to dump the grocery, accompanied my geandma to telok blangah to see doctor... after that, home...that's not the end of the day... went for movies at 11.45... monster house is actually a nice romantic love story... ended at 1.10, went home.. wanted to sleep, dragged out of bed for mahjong... so i played till around 4.40... den sleep...saturday, woke up half dead... went out of the house... i played solo during praise and worship... 2 songs were in b key, and i have no capo!!! OUCH... hand cramped, no backup, alot of hiccups... the last song is alot better, cos zhi came and asked me to play in a key... ok, but play to near the end of the song the d string broke... man!!! my guitar!! it needs a string replacement anyway... but im saving for missions!!! hai...after that had service, the presence is so strong, nobody can ignore... the tertiary people have gone overseas, should have landed now... God bless them man!! after that it's dinner, and home...i finally know how to play breaking free!! woohoo!!! still trying the start of something new... im getting better at the guitar... muahahaha...today's colour: ultimately guitar!!!
I blogged @ | 12:02 AM
{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}
Sunday, September 03, 2006 ....
my life's messed up... im losing focus... im tired... pray...
I blogged @ | 7:57 PM
{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}
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