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bleahz...
seriously, i dunno what to type here... i feel so dead i dun feel like typing anything... what's more the stress building up in me due to circumstances that are against me are killing me... thouge im not sweating blood yet, but i dunno how long i can hold onto it... argh... cant remember what i did for the whole week... all i know is i have to submit my DnT folio by monday, else it's bye to my 6th subject... mr Tan wants me to drop it... i think he doesn't want his percentage passes be affected... haha... ah well... off to do my DnT... pray for me...
I blogged @ | 10:02 AM
{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}
Saturday, August 19, 2006 bottles, bottles of clear liquid...
tears have been flowing alot for me these days... devil hates me... he shoots me hard... ah well, im still standing... =)on thursday my brother was in school at around 8 pm, he was walking round the school with some friends... he fell into a hole about 1/3 size of a normal classroon, one storey high... he fractured his spine, the 5th column from the top... it was dented in with a hairline fracture...on friday he was refered to hospital, need to be warded... i went there after school to visit him, in my uniform... as i saw him lying on the bed, tears trickled down my cheeks unknowingly... my own biological brother, suffering the pain... cant take it, and tears rolled down... i wiped if off before anyone could see it...after that my brother went for a CT scan, he felt severe giddiness.... after the doctors checked on him, he couldn't take it, he cried... my mum consoled him, saying that it's normal to feel giddy, cos he ate medicine on an empty stomach, therefore felt giddiness, not that his life is in peril... what the adults do not understand is that it's not that my brother's worried about his life coming to an end... it's that he cant take the pain... as i see him cry, i began to weep out bitterly too... the agony he's going through... it pains my heart as a brother... i cant take it... even when my mum comes and comfort me, i cant stop... i cant bear to see my brother suffering in pain... it hurts me so... ah well... tears flowed freely... hai...went home and showered... cried a little in the shower... after that went with my dad back to the hospital, camped there overnight looking after him... slept very little.... next morning went home at around 10... showered, changed, back to hospital... now with derek, sabrina, shara, qin ching, rongjun, yingmei... went to visit him... prayer for him, doctor came in with news that his bone is stable... cast for 12 weeks can liao, dun need operation... that's good... after that left for cell group...during cell group i stabbed my toe against needles... ken quak's core group ice breaker includes needles, and they dropped in on the floor... i cant see it against the carpet, so i stabbed my toe against one... ouch... went out, found out that the needle broke in my toe, and it really hurts... went down, mr chin got me a sissors, i began to scrape out the flesh around the needle, den when i hit the needle, using a nail clipper, pulled out the needle... thanks lisa jiejie for the nail clipper, thanks xiangshu for the sissors, and thank you Lord for the valuable experience...during snl, i cried again... during worship, i poured myself out to God... i couldn't take it... hai... 4th time im crying...man, i am a crybaby!! 4 times in 2 days... hai... im really worried about my brother... but what to do... what's done is done... pray for healing loh..today's colour: tears continue to flow...
I blogged @ | 11:35 PM
{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}
im turning mad...
something's possessing me... i dunno why, but it's occupying my mind... i cant get it off... im losing my focus... people, please pray for me... i need to refocus on God... please pray...
I blogged @ | 7:41 PM
{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}
random thoughts...
some interesting things that happened...national day went to pray!!! fasted... den went home... something happened that day, but it's bad, so forget about it...i finally watched advent children... it's nice... the battle graphics is beyond comprehension...my dad brought a n73, wanted to exchange it with me if my phone have bluetooth... dun have, ah well... he loves me... =)more people say i look old, more people say i lost weight... happy...cell group grew!! beginning to see new faces...had an emotional night on saturday... what happened..? im not saying... it involves someone else...play basketball on national day till 11.30... police came, took our ics, asked our addresses, copied our phone serial number... after that they just told us to go home... haha... thank goodness im over 17....met alex... talked, shopped, had fun... nothing much... but it's long since i've talked to him... that's good...alot other stuff, either boring or i cant bring to mind... ah well... my life... =)today's colour: feeling sad for someone right now...
I blogged @ | 9:18 PM
{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}
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