+ I will keep my eyes upon Jesus +

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

her results is out..

her cancer is in the first stages... going to receive chemotherapy and radio something... and success rate... 80 to 90% recovery.... praise God!! but she can only live up to 3 more years... in statistics... have to pray.... and work hard... have to minister her the word ASAP.... keep her in prayer guys....

sunday i stayed at home... to look after my grandma... actually wanted to go bible study... oh well... in the evening my aunts and uncles came down... and my dad broke the news to her... she's strong man.... as if she expected it... better this way.... dun wan her to think much....

monday had math mock exams... after that went home... su hui came my house... talked.... hahz...

tuesday my granny went hospital... checkup and got her medical results.... and i brought michael to get a haircut.... after that went home... that evening my grandma came home with my aunt... knew about her results... not bad... still got hope.... was happy... but my grandma is going to be BOTAK!!! oh no....

wednesday had mock exam... AGAIN.... this is getting boring... to me it's a waste of time... i read a book... the bar coda tattoo.... talking about bar coding humans... sounds alot like the mark of beast wor.... hmmm.... n1+n2 had a soccer match with n3 today... draw.... 20th min ken quak.... 30th min penalty goal by n3... 40th min ken quak... 2nd half i now sure... but i know last min zhi xuan... ah well.... it's ok folks....

now there's this ray of hope.... she can get cured!!! hope this works out....

today's colour: a ray oh hope shining down on me....

I blogged @ | 6:14 PM

{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}

Sunday, September 25, 2005

in need of prayer...

guys this is urgent... my grandma have recently been dignosed with lung cancer... and the cell are growing from the main artery in her lung... meaning no surgery can be done, and it cannot be cut off... so please... pray for her.... full results coming out only on tuesday... please keep her in prayer....

tuesday.... morning school.... mock exams.... afternoon went somewhere... but forget where le....

wednesday also have school... mock exams... after that went hougang bible study alex.... then went home...

thursday mock exams... again... after that went home, alvin followed me... he used my com and updated his blog.... got bitten by 3 mosquitoes... pray for him, against the dengue fever....syntoms only show after 5 to 7 days... pray that nothing will happen to him ya....?

friday went to zhi's house and studied chem... but in the end studied at bk... for around an hour den shift to coffee bean... nana joined us... derek taught rong jun science... i studied chemistry with liang zhi.... after that went home...

saturday woke at 6.30... woeing... after that went cell group... called alex more than 50 times but he din pick up his phone... later during dinner found out that he slept at 8 in the morning... and cant wake up till 8 something in the night... oh well....

cell attendance was pathetic... 6.... i was discouraged.... but den alvin shared something... dun be discouraged, disappointed and disatisfied.... i cheered up, gave thanks even for the 6 faithful ones, and had PaW.... suddenly tell me to plan... den i thought of something, played... after that went through first steps session 1... nothing much....

rushed down to church, a lil late... was good, pastor talked about the fruit of the spirit... Love... den something happened again....

pastor: "can somebody read that verse please..."
there was a silence, waiting for the person to read... suddenly....
me: "achoo!"

everybody looked at me... oh no... so freaking embarrassed....

pastor: "thanks ken! first you show me your armpit now you sneeze..."

ouch.... i had the mood to laugh then.... and i was blushing so hard... well, it went on smoothly....

something not right today... hmmm... alex not here... maybe a lil disappointed....? but i told myself not to.... keep my spirits high and persist....

after that dinner, whole zealot.... yq, wk tried my guitar... and lz taught michelle bay some dance steps... maybe i'll consider joining souled out...

im not really in the mood to blog... recently discovered some very very bad news... God...... it's all up to you right now.... im at a loss what to do....

today's colour: im lost.....

I blogged @ | 2:40 PM

{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

thanks ar derek...

me: tag me lehz... very boring lehz...
derek: u muz update den ppl can tag ma =p

so here i am... hahaz...

wednesday morning had a math paper 1... woah... easy lahz... o level really this come out ar den super nice....

after that guess where i went...? that's right!! hougang!! bible study alex... the more i bible study him... the higher he seems to rise... he's growing very very fast.... now i see his bible, highlight alot of things liaoz... alex to me is like derek to liang zhi.... they seriously encourage us, makes us wanna do a better job.... right zhizhi...?

oh ya before i carry on... ppl like derek, liang zhi, ken quak, pastor daniel and whoever comes by... TAG!!! please tag.... really, tag!!! so that i know you came...

after that went yew tee... AGAIN... teach them play maple... one n levels coming liaoz... one psle coming liaoz... another one still got excuse lahz.... but major exams coming liaoz still play like that... aiyo... need to teach them...

thursday... what did i do ar...? go down yew tee and play maple.... nothing else...? den go home sleep... hahaz... im a pig....

friday... also forgot what i did in the morning... hahaz... evening went play maple... AGAIN... but only awhile and then, basketball....

i got to learn more people... i got to know sheryl(<---dunno spell correct anot) who happens to sit beside joey in class... pete, a very zhuai basketball player... zhi jie, ah beng who was in our church... sadly he backslided.... haiz... i managed to improve my jump shots... got chance try me ok...? hahz...

sat... cell... alex came!! yay... but he's still quiet.... somemore... teck soon also came!!! no hair liaoz!! hahz.. very very handsome... cell was encouraging... and our cell is starting lessons... keyboard and guitar... raising up 2 keyboardist and 2 guitarist... namely alex and angela, wee kiat and me... hahz... den slowly...? we are going to have a band!!

after that went snl... wanping shared... hong cheong and dawn came!!! woohoo!!! sososososososo excited.... till someone complain... hahaz... sshhh...

after that went cck park... (eventful day...?) meet my family... play with candles... eat... hahz... went lot one with kelvin and wanted to plat initial d... but... too many people... hahz... went home... sleep....

sunday tuition.... after that sent grandma to hospital... she having operation on monday... so have to go in on sunday... after that ate... went home... dunno why so tired... hit my bed and fell asleep... haiz...

monday morning had math paper 2... oh me gosh!! so hard... 1st question spent around 15 to 20 min on it... i chiong, grabbing as much marks as possible... managed to finish it in time... lost around 10 marks... but not too bad... still got 90!!! if the Lord wasn't with me... i dunno what i'll do... i made alot of careless mistakes... if the Lord remind me... im DEAD.... thank you Jesus!!

after that i went to my grandpa house sweep floor... but on the way... felt something very magical...

walking to west mall from my school that road... it was drizzling... i slowed down... enjoyed the lovely refreshing shower from God... i opened my eyes and looked up... woah... the feeling... closeness to nature... i felt as if im in payon... in it's peaceful forest, so this song goes... i felt a tingle of liveliness... and i could almost see animals running about doing their stuff... i felt im back in the peaceful forest of payon... that's why i became an archer in RO... hahaz....

den went to grandpa house sweep floor... ok... record!! 4 dead cockroaches!!! eeww!! disgusting... and im sweeping it... aww....

now at home blogging... later goin see my grandma...

today's colour: mystical payon forest....

I blogged @ | 6:25 AM

{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}

Wednesday, September 14, 2005

i "molted"...

changed my skin.... nice ma...? i know look like a girl one... but i like this one... hahaz...been rather busy... here goes...

my anger subsided really fast!!! /heh... by next morning, thursday, im happy again... went to hougang... not to play with alex... to BIBLE STUDY HIM!!! woohoo.... i've already won him over... went to play 2 hours of dota(ok... guilty... got play lahz....) and bible studied him... said the sinners prayer!!! woohoo!! he's saved... so happy... so happy... but den something sad happened...

i could have spent time with alex... but teck soon say wanna go eat seoul garden... and he goin police acadamy on tuesday... ok loh... i rushed down... just to find out that zealot did NOT go... they planned for sunday... diaoz...? i only found out halfway on the way home... have to change plans... i could have had dinner with alex... spent more time... have more fun... but... ah well...

ate at went mall with nana, andy, qin ching, angela, sabrina, mark, shara, wee kiat... i ate ALOT... cos i din eat in the morning... ate ramen, a bowl of rice and half a hotplate toufu... why half...? andy also hungry... so i bought him a bowl of rice and we share share... he no money ma... poor thing.... after that went home...

friday evening went to bb and gb sambawang camp site... i found out that it is only down the road of the pub my dad often brings me to... went there for bb's 16 years of service... anivesary... thought got food... wee kiat was thinking buffet or bbq... in the end nothing!! no food... unless you consider snicker bars... hahaz... after went out to eat... kenny kept on saying russell peters jokes... be a man.. do the right thing... hahaz...

saturday i got alex down for cell and snl... i got news on thursday to do ice breaker... today i got a call from alvin at around 10... "ken ar, do Praise and worship..." diaoz?!?! ok... im running the major show... in fact, im running the whole show... darn... ah well... who tell me be guitarist...

played a disgusting game... and those idiots play me... 2 packs of msg... 1 pack of oil... 2 or 3 packs of chili... few drops of chicken rice chili... one piece of bread... im supposed to finish it!!! and i did.... i din puke... i can go fear factor liaoz... muahahahaz.... praise and worship is... well... bad... cos no time practice... and i am really bad... aww.... after that we shard about our week... that's all... im practically running the whole show... ah well...

after that went snl... pulled alex in front... he din jump... but he lifted his hands to worship... woohoo!! my first sheep!! im so proud... *sniff sniff* after that he received tongues!!! he speak so fluently!!! woahness!! and so fast somemore... 8th sept received christ.... 11th sept received holy spirit... woahness... as how jesslyn said it... felt so great...

sunday went tuition.. but i practically slacked there... snore... after that went church... have a little bible study... it was so full i have to carry chairs and sit!! sat in the last row... there was this point whereby i was stretching....

pastor:"ken are you asking me a question or are you stretching...?"
me:"nahz.. just stretching..."
pastor:"i was thinking how come you are showing me your armpit..."

everybody laughed... out loud... lol really served it's purpose here... and the whole room was full.. darn embarrassing...peiyi said she would run out of the church if she was me... but, ah heck... i love people laughing... dun care if it's at me or next to me... it makes me happy....

handed up my mission trip form... yay!!!

but on the same day... i saw someone cry.... though we're not that close... but my heart still went out for her... i have no idea why but whenever i see her cry... my heart goes out to her... not to other people... only to her... she seems to be sufferring alot in her life, i can tell... i'll pray for her... i hope you know who you are... and i do NOT have and ideas on her... FINAL... im tired of people saying idoitic stuff about me...

after that... went steamboat buffet at turf city... for teck soon... to say good bye to him... one very touching thing.... i din have money... they paid for me... if i could cry i would... im really touched... thanks guys... posted for stupid pictures for teck soon... read zhizhi's blog for some details... i fed wee kiat ice cream and he fed me... hahaz... wait till ah teck comes out of army den ask him for the pics... and i post for you all see...

after the steamboat we took alvin, liang zhi and teck soon, took one NTUC trolley, threw them in one by one and pushing them all over... hahaz... teck soon complain wanna puke... cos eat till cannot eat... argh.... den let him down... den went home... hahaz... fun fun...

monday morning... nothing much.... studies.... after school went to angela's house to meet with ts... one last time... he prayed for us... every one of us.... one by one he went around and pray... /sob.... so touched... after that we all prayed for him... one last time before he goes... ah well... he's gone now...

tuesday morning... have 7 and 1/2 free periods!!! woohoo!!! slack time... i sleep till cannot sleep nia... hahaz... when the clock hit 8.30... i felt a tingle of saddness... ah... he's gone to army... be brave teck soon!!! i'll be praying!!!

after that went unity sec... lent guitar to si heng... but i made shi xian wait for 1.5 hours!!! i so bad!!! sorry ah giam.... went play bball with cs... played a lil bit of guitar with si heng... wanted to teach with liang zhi... but i have a so called date with shi xian... went to study.... in the end ended up playing...

today very suay... go to library study... say xian's friend... i kena suan till upside down... den sat down do some work... awhile later sian diao... run away... see noobs play maple... den i also there help shi wei and shi hui do up their accounts... practically slacked...

personal reflections... i realised i've been independent of God... i've been doing things my way... never pray before i decide anything... i'll ask him for decisions from now on!! wo yao chong xin zhuo ren!!

another personal reflection.... i realised that i often dun have money.. but i have alot of friends who do.... though i din ask for it... they always lend me first... and sometimes forget to return them.... they also forget to ask... and that became a blessing to me... im so touched... from the bottom of my heart... thanks guys....

phew... i know it's very very VERY long.... hahaz... my fingers also numb liaoz... have to sleep... tml e math o level prelims!!! ken ken jia you!! can do it de!!!

today's colour: his love is warmer than the warmest sunshine softer than a sigh.....

I blogged @ | 2:30 PM

{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}

Thursday, September 08, 2005

my blog is dying....

im finally back... after another week... cant find any time.... can find time com also kena snatched by bro and sis.... haiz... was darn fed up... here's my story....

tuesday had mock exams... nothing much....

wednesday had teacher's day celebration.... went back to pri school... suhui bought a $70 2.5kg cake for the teachers... aawww... had fun... but only a few people from our batch went back... me, anqi, wei jie, suhui, fan hui, padro... pathetically few.... so sad... ah well... had fun... enjoyed the time we spent together... after that went home....

thursday stayed at home and mug.... coming mon and tue have exams... duh... bo bian... haiz....

friday went back school mock exams... cant remember much what happened....

sat had games day.... had so much fun... i brought alex along with me... he had fun too.. made some new friends.... but got people play unfair... too bad.... we lost in terms of points... but we got most spontanous team... after that went church... pastor daniel as usual... this time alex is with me... guess what...? i saw him lifting up his hands and worship... my jaws almost dropped... woah woah!!! how come he know how to lift up his hands...?

i sent him back to hougang... on the way back den i realised that he went church around 10 years ago... when he's still in kindergardern... and he kinda believe in Jesus now... im gonna make him say the sinner's prayer this thursday!! woohoo!!! yay!!! new people saved!! left celine... easy lahz... muahahz.... God is for me... who's against me...?

but i messed up... sent him home... den i cant catch the last train home... have to take cab... reached home kena scolded very badly by mummy... waste her money... haiz... too bad...

sunday also mugged... have to study chinese and social studies... mug mug mug....

monday had chinese paper... ermz... it's over lahz... dun wanna say anything....

after that in the evening met up with alvin... wanted to study... in the end played 2 hours of pool... 2 hours dota... 1/2 hours eat... 1 hr cs... go home... hhaz... we both need a break..

tuesday had chinese listening... den i realised that the listening compre is broadcasted over the radio!! how cool...? way cool!! after that bible studied youngly... den tool social studies paper... i only study merger and seperation... and it came out... God showed siew ling and wee kiat industralisation as well as substaining developement... it also came out... how good is God anyway...?

after all these i went to my grandpa house to clean up the house... have to sweep up dead roaches... haiz... i dun clean who clean... den my aunt call me... say i guai... den buy lunch for me... i went home... and saw it on the table... here comes the fed upping part...

was tired... took a nap... woke up and it's gone... hell... wanted to use the com... so long never use le cos mugging... dun give... find excuses.... haiz...exams finish le... can do what...? i die die wun study... see tv, ah ma watching, den darn boring... cannot change channel... see com, got people snatch from me... see my guitar, play awhile... sian.... see mahjong, wanna play, but nobody play with me... see food, hungry, thought of my lunch, no appeitite... layed on bed, try to sleep, layed for 3 to 4 hours, cannot sleep... what a miserable life... haiz.... wanna go out... nobody seems to be free anyway... how.... crap....

wednesday went school.... darn... what kinda holidays is this... still have to study... bo bian... after that a lil basketball... den went church office... do what...? STUDY!!! argh... im sick of that word... i go there teach people instead of studying myself... muahahz... chin tell me not to come... cos i good enough to study on my own... and scared i might disturb them... oh well... after that 2 hours of pool factor... muahahz...

went home... want com... waited for 1 and 1/2 hours... finally got it!! 2 min later gugu ask me go da gu house.... darn... i hate this.... i seriously hate this... i dun have any proper change to touch the computer.... ah well... came back at around 12... i declared my turn... den my sis snatch... this time i had it... im seriously fed up.... face went black...openly showed that im not happy... stormed back into the room... layed in bed but cant sleep... the frustration dwelling in my is keeping me awake... even though i can sleep.... i hate this... have to wait for her to level up... come on man... im the weakest in the guild... and clan risa is conquering a castle this weekend... dun i need to train up too...? dun i need to level up too...? why must it be me waiting for them instead of them waiting for me?!?! cos im the elder brother...? cos im caring and understanding...? so they just walk all over me...?

felt so fed up... wanted to should a big F U in front of their faces... but i managed myself... stormed into the room... tried to sleep... cant... so here i am venting my anger in my post... darn... crap... fish... freak.... sigh...

today's colour: this anger better subside fast... before it turn into sin... ken... relax....

I blogged @ | 5:44 PM

{Lift up your eyes, all you Heavens, and Worship}